I’ve talked a lot about saying no, and taking care of yourself. I guess these are things I’ve come to learn quite recently. But I also want to talk about our relationships with others.
As I’ve gotten older, I’ve noticed that I’ve gotten busier and my time has felt more precious. It’s made me more careful with how I spend my time and who I spend that time with.
This has meant spending less time with acquaintances, or people that I don’t have a lot in common with, and focusing my time on those that really matter to me.
I’ve come to realise that I would rather have a few close friends – people I trust deeply, share my secrets and stories with, really connect with – rather than a big circle of people that I don’t feel so close with.
This means that my time and energy is free to really connect and be present with close friends when I do see them. It means that I really enjoy my time with these people, and I always leave our catch-ups feeling happy, grateful and refreshed.
But it takes effort to make a relationship, of any kind, stay great. Don’t assume that a relationship will take care of itself – it requires ongoing care. This means scheduling time with that person, showing up ready to enjoy their company and being present during your time together. It also means being aware of yourself and what kind of friend you are being.
Sometimes the busyness of life stops me from spending time with friends. I often find that when I do have a moment free, I want to rest and look after myself. And while I do think that’s important, I also think that nurturing close relationships is equally important. It is about finding a balance between the two.
Who are you closest with? Why?
Are there people that you find yourself spending time with, but not really enjoying it? How might your life be different if you spent less time with these people?
What does a good friendship look like to you?
Do you think you are you a good friend? Why or why not?
How could you nurture close relationships more?
Note: this post was originally part of a series of 30 life lessons and journal prompts for my 30th birthday. You can access the rest of the lessons and prompts here.