Tag: courage

Creativity

Give yourself creative permission

Jen Morris

A while ago I took the Layers of Life Visual Journal workshop and one of the first things we were told to do in our journal was to give ourselves permission.

I love this and I think it’s something we don’t do enough of.

It might seem a bit unnecessary, maybe. You think, well of course I have permission to write in my journal, duh.

But have you given yourself permission to do all the things you want to do? To make a mess, to make mistakes, to cross things out and start again, to look foolish, to try new things, to dream of a better life – even start to take steps towards it?

Your journal can be a powerful tool if you give yourself permission to just be, however you want, inside it.

I’ve mentioned ad nauseam about my perfectionism, so for me giving myself permission to make a mess is a big deal. So many times I’ve started a journal and it’s not until halfway through that I’ve realised that I’m too afraid to make a mistake or do anything that risks not being pretty!

Not to mention I seem to unconsciously give myself rules each time I start a new journal – what I
can and cannot journal about in that journal, what type of journaling it will be, etc.

How freeing (and admittedly a little scary) it is to declare in the front of my journal that it can be for any damn thing I want it to be: writing, painting, stamping, collage, washi tape, watercolours, scribbles, stencils, sketches, doodles, prompts, stream-of-consciousness, lists, mindmaps, nonsense, ideas, dreams etc. WHATEVER!

So I urge you the next time you start a new journal – or heck, even in the middle of your journal right now – to dedicate a page to giving yourself permission.You could list the things you want to do, collage images, draw – whatever feels good and best represents the creative freedom you need.

Give yourself permission to do whatever feels good in your journal – in fact, in your life – whatever you need.

Creativity

New art journal – an altered book

Jen Morris

I’ve started a new art journal, and I wanted to share what I’m doing. As a journal lover, a writer and an avid reader, I’ve been really fascinated with the idea of altered books.

I recently came across this neat old French text-book when clearing out a really old cupboard at school. I think it’s from the 1970s. It’s fantastic as an altered journal because the pages are sewn, not stapled, so they will hold up well. It is sturdy and bound well, and the paper is quite thick.

Most of the writing is in French, but there is some English inside, plus lots of interesting pictures of Paris and other French things I can incorporate into future journal pages.

The reason I’m creating this altered book journal in addiction to my other art journals is because I need something low-stakes I can make a mess in. It cost me nothing and there are lots of pages I can play with. I simply slap on a coat of gesso, then set about using my gelli plate, paints, stamps, stencils, washi tape and pens to play.

My other art journals are a bit more precious, and I find myself wanting to create something that is pretty, rather than actually playing and exploring different media. I felt like I needed a place I could make a mess and be ok with it.

This, of course, is going to be a pretty strong theme throughout!

I want this journal to be sort of like a normal journal in that I can explore and express how I’m feeling at the time, but visually. I’m new to art journaling so I’m just trying to teach myself various techniques and things as I go. But, the point is, to keep doing. Keep making a mess, because from that mess comes something interesting.

Here are a few pages I’ve made so far, and a few close-ups on details I particularly like.

make-mistakes

butterfly-play

an-essential-aspect-of-creativity-close-up

create-be-fearless

i-wish-to-be-fearless

the-time-is-now

What Inspires Me

Found poem: Write the truth

Jen Morris

This poem was ‘found’ on page 80 of Julia Cameron’s The Artist’s Way (totally amazing book, if you haven’t read it).

 

I have noticed

an unpleasant

evasion.

The creeping feeling that

this possibility

will stay lost

in the

extreme emotions of the pages themselves,

unable to perform

a course adjustment,

if I don’t

write the truth.

Creativity, Self Empowerment

The risk to blossom

Jen Morris

 

Anais Nin famously said:

And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.

I love this quote, so much. It is only recently that I have come to realise that it is too painful for me to remain tight in a bud – I am now taking the risk to blossom.

I think this quote means that we stay in our comfort zones, we deny our true feelings and we try to protect ourselves.

Since starting a regular journaling routine, I have come to realise that I can blossom – it isn’t as scary or dangerous as it seems. I have all the courage I need inside.

Here are a few of the ways I used to ‘remain tight in a bud’:

  • Drinking
  • Watching a lot of television
  • Spending hours online
  • Napping
  • Overeating
  • Spending time with people I didn’t really care for, just so I wouldn’t have to be alone
  • Overworking, becoming exhausted
  • Denying that I had any control over my life
  • Shopping aimlessly
  • Dieting relentlessly
  • Perfectionism and procrastination

But now that I’ve created an ongoing dialogue with my true, authentic self through my daily journaling routine, I am finding the courage to ‘blossom’ in these ways:

  • Starting (and continuing) a creative practice
  • Experimenting with different art supplies and techniques, such as acrylic paint, watercolour, mixed media, crayons, pencils, pens, etc
  • Building a tiny house
  • Starting my own creative business
  • Acknowledging my deepest desires and daring to believe I can make them a reality
  • Sharing my work, my thoughts and ideas with others
  • Accepting myself as a flawed but deeply lovable human being
  • Quitting dieting

These are just a few of the ways I have sought to change my life over the past 6 months. Looking back now it seems like I’ve made quite a few big changes – most of them are internal. Most of them are shifts in my sense of courage, of determination. the external changes have naturally flowed on from there.

I can’t say it enough: it is the simple act of journaling each day that has allowed me to get to this point. It is the ongoing conversation with my true self, with my inner wisdom and courage. It is being awake in my life, rather than numbing my feelings through the things in the first list above.

So I challenge you: in what ways do you attempt to remain tight in a bud, and how can you find the courage to blossom?

Creativity

Journal prompt: I am…

Jen Morris

Today I want to share a simple journal prompti-am I found in Marlene Schiwy’s A Voice of Her Own. This is a great book with lots of journaling tips, techniques, prompts and ideas. I’m really enjoying reading it at the moment.

The prompt is fairly simple, but it got me thinking about different aspects of my life, and myself, on quite a deep level.

It doesn’t take very long, and your answers could serve as a base to give you more to write about in detail in later journal entries.

>>> Prompt:

Take three pages in your journal. At the top of page one, write ‘I am’, at the top of page two write ‘I am not’ and on the last page write ‘I would like to be’.

Then, doing one page at a time, fill it with whatever comes to mind. You could do your pages as mindmaps, you could freewrite, or you could list your answers.

My answers were in list form, some were single words and others phrases. Here is a some from my own journal entry:

I am…

  • Creative
  • Ambitious
  • Tired
  • Hopeful
  • Learning to express myself creatively
  • Changing my life
  • Developing courage
  • Passionate about many things
  • Loving

I am not…i-would-like-to-be

  • Prepared to put my dreams on hold for any longer
  • Going to keep hiding parts of myself
  • Dieting
  • Prepared to settle
  • Going to limit my dreams and desires
  • Satisfied

I would like to be…

  • Fearless
  • At peace
  • Free
  • More focused and less scattered
  • An inspiration and role model to others
  • More willing to take risks
  • More creative

These are just a few things from my own lists. These lists are quite simple but there is a lot here that I could explore in later journal entries. I was even surprised by a few things that came up – for example, ‘I am not going to keep hiding parts of myself’. This has highlighted to me that there are times when I feel like I can’t truly be myself, which is something I would like to explore further.

If you have 15 minutes this weekend, take the time to try this prompt!

What Inspires Me

Wild Geese

Jen Morris

Today I just wanted to share another poem I love by Mary Oliver. I love her poetry. She has an amazing way of weaving together beautiful natural imagery and the wonder that is life.

Wild Geese

You do not have to be good.
You do not have to walk on your knees
For a hundred miles through the desert, repenting.
You only have to let the soft animal of your body
love what it loves.
Tell me about your despair, yours, and I will tell you mine.
Meanwhile the world goes on.
Meanwhile the sun and the clear pebbles of the rain
are moving across the landscapes,
over the prairies and the deep trees,
the mountains and the rivers.
Meanwhile the wild geese, high in the clean blue air,
are heading home again.
Whoever you are, no matter how lonely,
the world offers itself to your imagination,
calls to you like the wild geese, harsh and exciting —
over and over announcing your place
in the family of things.

Self Empowerment

Take all the time you need

Jen Morris

The universe has a way of slowing us down if we are going too fast. So often we feel reluctant to stop and rest when we can be busy and productive.

Our society prizes busy-ness over rest.

Today I had a hard time just resting, just doing nothing. But, my body was screaming at me to stop, so I curled up on the couch with a blanket, my laptop, some lemon tea and watched Friends re-runs (I would have chosen The Office but I watched that not long ago).

It was great. I will probably have to do the same thing tomorrow.

I felt myself wanting to go to my desk, to paint or play with my new stamp-carving supplies (yay!) or do a load of laundry (not so yay, but still has to be done!), but I forced myself to stay under the covers. I even had to cancel dinner with friends, which I had been looking forward to all week.

I talk a lot about rest. I don’t think it can be overemphasized in today’s world.

As a highly sensitive person (HSP) I tend to feel more easily overwhelmed, tired and just plain run-down than the average person. Add to that a stressful teaching job, and I’m basically constantly tired. Approximately 15-20% of the population is HSP (see here).

I do my best to stay as productive as the next person – I do my creative projects, spend time with family and friends, walk the dog, work on my creative business – but sometimes life just steps in and says ‘Enough for now! Time to rest!’

The key is being able to notice the signs, then having the courage to say no – to cancel appointments, to turn down invitations, to risk letting people down.

I’m sick with a cold at the moment, but you don’t need to have an illness to need time to rest. Sometimes it’s just feeling tired, overwhelmed, tearful, crabby or like you just want everyone to leave you alone.

So take the time to rest. Take all the time you need.

Self Empowerment

On sickness and blogging

Jen Morris

I am sick at the moment. Sore throat. Runny nose. Headache. Just general crapness.

I have attempted to write an amazing blog post three times now. It’s not happening. Time to face the fact: today’s post is going to be pretty average.

But I guess by honouring where I am right now and being authentic, there may be something worth saying.

That’s one of the really hard things about doing this every day. And I guess this would apply to doing anything every day. Some days it just won’t work, for whatever reason. Maybe you run out of time. Maybe you have to take care of your kids or your partner or someone else, and there’s no room left for you at the end of it. Maybe you’re unwell *cough*.

I think it’s good to commit to doing something regularly.

I’ve seen dramatic changes in my life from journaling and blogging regularly. And it’s been really good to be pushed to do it every day. Mostly. Most of the time, I just need a wee nudge to get on with it and then I’m glad I did. Having the commitment encourages me to challenge myself.

And, occasionally, I don’t want to do it. And that’s also ok. Taking a break from doing something can also be rewarding and can help you to move towards your goal faster, without burning out.

So while I am still posting today because that’s the commitment I’ve made and I want to show up, I’m also going easy on myself. This isn’t brilliant writing. But I think it’s good to show that.

It’s good to let the world see me on my crap days too.

To see that I’m trying, that I’m willing to push forward – to see me as I am, now.

Because otherwise, how can we truly be vulnerable? How can we truly progress, if we can’t admit when we aren’t feeling good, when we need a little help, when things aren’t going to plan? How can we grow without accepting where we are?

Creativity

Journal prompt: Define success

Jen Morris

I’ve been doing a lot of reflecting lately after coming across my old journals from high school. I posted earlier this week about allowing ourselves to dream big – as we do when we are younger.

Today as I was journaling, and thinking about the things the younger me wanted but didn’t have, I realised something. I am unsure of what success looks like – or at least, what it looks like to me. I don’t know how to define success in my own life.

I must say, I was a little shocked. As much as I know what I want to achieve in my life (and a lot of that has changed from when I was younger!) I wasn’t able to clearly articulate what my life would look like if I were ‘successful’.

Success obviously means different things to different people – for some it is the more obvious signs of success such as a nice house or car, getting married, earning a certain amount of money. For others it is simply to wake up each day with a smile, or to spend their time as they would like.

values

Somehow I had managed to avoid answering this question for myself, despite the fact that I spend a lot of time thinking about what I want more of in my life.The more I journaled about this, the clearer I got.

For me, success is:

  • being able  to support myself (and my family-to-be) financially
  • being able to travel regularly
  • making a living using my creativity and being myself
  • the freedom to choose how I spend my time and how much I work
  • completing creative projects such as writing and art
  • building my own house with my own hands – and not owing money on it
  • helping others to live satisfying and fulfilling lives

A few of these things I was unaware of. The first one was a bit of a surprise – I had always assumed I would be happy for my partner to be the breadwinner while I took care of the family. But actually, I have realised that it is important to me to contribute financially and even support our family so my partner can follow his creative dreams.

What does success mean to you? You might think you know, but try answering the following prompts. It’s good to have a clear idea because otherwise it’s difficult to know how you feel about your life and what you want to achieve.

>>> Prompts:

First of all, identify what it is you value. What is most important to you in life?

Growing up, what did it mean to you to be successful as an adult? Who did you admire for their success – what did they have/do? (For example, I wanted nothing more than to be Mariah Carey because of her amazing voice and huge international success – now I’m not so sure I’d want that at all!)

Do you still admire these people, or are there new people you admire? What is it about them that you admire?

If you were to meet someone who you felt was successful, what would their life look like? Is it different from how society tends to define success? How? How does it tie into your values?

At the end of your life if you were to look back on what you have done, what would your life look like if you had been successful? Or, if you were to read your own obituary, what would you like it to say?

Creativity

Journal prompt: The journey

Jen Morris

I was thinking tonight on the drive home from work how much I’ve changed over the past few years.

In particular, the past six months of consistent journaling have seen me reconnect with myself. This is a strange thing to say, but it’s true.

I feel more like myself than I have in a long time – possibly ever.

hot-air-balloonsIt’s like I was going through the motions, feeling like my life was a little off, not quite what I wanted – but I couldn’t put my finger on what it was that was wrong.

Now I know what was wrong. I was afraid (there’s that word again!). Afraid to listen to the little voice inside me – that’s when I could hear it – and afraid to make the changes I so craved to make.

I was afraid of failure, of what people would think, of having regrets, of not doing what I ‘should’ do.

And you know what? Fuck it. Life is too damn short.

I’m not afraid anymore.

The world is mine for the taking. I’m leaving behind the things that make me unhappy, the fears that people will judge me, or that I will make a mistake.

I’m creating an unconventional and exceptional life. I’m building a tiny house. I’m starting my own creative business so that I can work for myself, helping others and doing work I love. I’m creating regularly. I’ve quit dieting. These are just the first few steps towards a happier, healthier, more fulfilling life.

journey-quote

Here is possibly my most favourite poem, ever. It summarises my journey, and I’m sure, the journey of many others.

‘The Journey’ by Mary Oliver

One day you finally knew
what you had to do, and began,
though the voices around you
kept shouting
their bad advice
though the whole house
began to tremble
and you felt the old tug
at your ankles.
‘Mend my life!’
each voice cried.
But you didn’t stop.

You knew what you had to do,
though the wind pried
with its stiff fingers
at the very foundations
though their melancholy
was terrible. It was already late
enough, and a wild night,
and the road full of fallen
branches and stones.

But little by little,
as you left their voices behind,
the stars began to burn
through the sheets of clouds,
and there was a new voice,
which you slowly
recognized as your own,
that kept you company
as you strode deeper and deeper
into the world,
determined to do
the only thing you could do – – –
determined to save
the only life you could save.

>>> Prompts:

What is your journey? Can you describe it in a few sentences or paragraphs or a poem? If you’re stuck, try to write it in the second person as Oliver has done in her poem.

How have you changed?

Is there a journey you would like to take (either metaphorical or literal)? What is stopping you?

Do you feel like yourself? If so, how do you know? If not, why not?